Romantic Love is •●Shallow●•

•✫⤠Romance is an elaborate illusion like God & Free Will•✫⤠

If Romance imitated reality, it wouldn’t have fascinated humans at all.

Reality is boring. That’s why Marvel makes Billions.

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Name• Romance

Three Lives• 5798 days

1^st Birth• 1^st April 2005
3^rd Death• 14^th February 2021

Tombstone• “And you thought true romance never dies.”

That’s the timeline of the •births & deaths• of the three true romances of my inelegant life.

It wasn’t until I was 23 that I bumped into a girl I felt insane about. In the next 17 years, I ran into two girls who floated along my blood & turned my life into a bohemian rhapsody.

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Earlier today, I finished reading Oscar Wilde’s [1890] — The Picture of Dorian Gray. Lord Henry Wotton’s hundreds of delightful cynicisms like 

—I can sympathize with everything, except suffering— 

—A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he doesn’t love her—  made my frosty heart chuckle & my withering soul break into a dance.

•✫⤠People who don’t know me too well claim I’m cynical. 

People who know me too well are certain I’m cynical.•✫⤠

Am I cynical?

After intricate introspection, I reckon the correct moniker for me would be — •●cunty●•

Why cunty?

I pull no punches; I’m explicitly rude. 

I don’t hesitate in calling people out on their privilege, cowardice, entitlement, sentimentality, superficiality, indifference, classism, deluded wokism, & unapologetic narcissism.

Everytime I speak, I offend people. And often, even my silence offends people. I’ve been told that “I’m a low-life, arrogant, bitter, insensitive, condescending piece of trash who gets orgasms by belittling people without knowing anything about them.”

A girl I was on a date with told me without mincing words, “The world would be a happier place if you were to choke on ice & die tonight.” I know of at least three humans who’d throw a Great Gatsby-style lavish party if I were to suddenly drop dead.

Yesterday, I told a young friend, “Lose weight or your boyfriend will replace you with a lighter bitch.” This offended her deeply. Later that night, she text-told me three things. 

1. I crossed the line. What I said is likely to make her conscious of her body.
2. What I said was disrespectful to her boyfriend. He [& their relationship] isn’t so shallow.
3. Their relationship is none of my business.

She’s unquestionably right about all three things. 

Do I stand by what I said?

I do.

P.S. If you read the three things carefully — at no point does my friend say what I said to her was untrue or dishonest. She said it was off-limits & insulting.

Will I say it again?

I won’t.

Why?

⋖⋗I rather be effective than be right⋖⋗

If my words will offend her instead of making her recognize the cold truth that

•✫⤠Mother of every Romance is Attraction &

         Mother of every Attraction is Shallow•✫⤠

My life’s standard modus-operandi is to keep my pie-hole shut — say nothing about people’s relationships. Humans are touchy about anything mildly unpleasant about their income, intelligence, religion or relationships — particularly the pretty-rich-educated-young humans whose relationship is young & yet to be bloodied by the darker knives of romantic love.

If my acid honesty isn’t effective then I shall tape my tongue & stick to cowardly silence. 

Why did I not stick to cowardly silence in this instance?

Love.

When you love someone, you’re not nice to them, you’re frank with them. Even if they hate your guts for it, you gotta speak your truth. If you can’t speak your heart with someone you love then your love is just as shallow as romantic love, where we’re expected to make her feel like she’s the most beautiful girl in the galaxy and make him feel like he’s a rockstar in the streets & in the sheets. Anything less & you’re labelled a stone-hearted betch/basterd.

✫Fun Facts✫

Family is built on Sentimentality

Religion is built on Fear

Society is built on [questionable] Morality

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Romance is built on Charm.

Friendship is built on Courage.

•✫⤠17 years ago•✫⤠

Saturday — 11^th June 2005 — College — I’m lying next to the human I Love.

Dodo lay with her head on my chest as she looked at me like I was a Van Gogh masterpiece. In those eyes, I saw a tricky question brewing. And then it poured out. 

‘Would you have fallen in love with me if I weren’t beautiful?’

She really put me on the spot & I found it difficult to get my thoughts together to come up with a perfect movie-like response. All I coolly said was, ‘I don’t see why not,’ but she called out my bullshit.

‘If I were fat, you would never have asked me out in the first place — so falling in love is totally out of the question.

‘I’m not questioning your love for me. I have no doubt about that. What I’m saying is, even the most beautiful love stories have shallow beginnings.’

•✫⤠Today•✫⤠

Saturday — 23^rd July 2022 — Café — Reminiscing about Romance & Love.

All three of my romances [Dodo Börsha ^✰xíḉ⧷⋮] had shallow beginnings, but they grew up to become birds & taught me five things

Show ••Grace•• even when it’s absolutely justified to show zero humility, zero mercy 

Stick to true ••Purpose•• instead of chasing hollow dreams to make million hollow dollars

Show ••Resilience•• amidst frightening Adversity

Whenever in doubt, choose ••kindness••

••Love•• is like a baby — it loves you madly then it grows up & leaves, but it never truly leaves.

No one chooses to romance a fat girl or a balding boy if they’ve a choice to romance Leonardo DiCaprio or Scarlett Johansson. Ryan Reynolds didn’t divorce Scarlett Johansson & began romancing Blake Lively because she has a beautiful heart — they romanced because he’s prettier than Paris & she’s prettier than Venice.

Dodo was right — if she were fat & unpretty, I wouldn’t have noticed her — wouldn’t have asked her out. I would never have fallen in love with her.

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Romance or Economy •✫⤠Imbalance causes Collapse•✫⤠

Great Recession [’07-’09] made the Global Economies drop like dominoes. 

Reason?

Imbalance [Banks loaned billions to homeless hippies]

I give two zillion fucks about my friend. In the 7 years I’ve known her, I’ve created stories & felt love for her & we both have lost a parent. In 2022, sticking with someone for seven years is like sticking with someone for 77 years — a lifetime. Our rishta is built on a mountain of tough truths, not an ocean of niceties. 

Nice is a ‘polite term’ for cowardice. I’d rather be a racist than nice.

People aren’t nice because they give a damn, they’re nice so everyone likes them.

People are kind because they give a damn — because they care.

Kindness is disguised in my cuntiness. I don’t want her romance to ‘crash & burn’ for a reason that’s totally material — hence controllable. Unlike the stupid-greedy banks that never learn from fuckups & keep doling out ₹10 thousand crore loans [Mallya, Nirav], she can nip the few extra kilos in the bud. But I will never ask her to again and respect her word that ‘It’s none of my goddamn business.’

 

When an artistic, maverick, pretty, likable girl [my friend] begins romancing a bloke who’s intelligent, handsome, affluent & charming, romance is fireworks — but if he swiftly begins to lose his intelligence, looks, fortune & charisma, their romance will collapse quicker than the Twin Towers because of the imbalance. And vice-versa.

If their romance withstands the whirlwinds, then

Their romance can evolve into a beautiful love story that the future humans, trees, & penguins of the galaxy will remember long-long after my friend & her boyfriend are dead & dust.

•✫⤠True romances are rare as eclipses, but who knows — lightning can strike•✫⤠

{Warning: This letter is written by a bloke who eats babies for breakfast}